SRSLY, New York Times?

It's a slow day at work, I have a prescription for antibiotics, and a man-pooch is the new hipster accessory. That is all.

Things I am learning about True Blood that IMDb is teaching me

• There is no way the actress who plays Jessica is not a natural redhead. I refuse to believe it.
• Arlene is married to the guy who plays Benjamin Linus on Lost.
• The guy who plays Eric, Alexander Skarsgard, is five-time winner of the title sexiest man in Sweden. He's also the son of the guy who played Bootstrap Bill in Pirates of the Caribbean.
• Sam went to Brown. Detective Bellefleur went to Yale and recently played a character whose last name is Dempsey. Coincidence? Probably.
  

I may have a problem.

John Hughes died and I am sad

Sadder than I have any right to be, given that The Breakfast Club came out the year before I was born. Nostalgia is a funny beast.

Capitalism is Evil

Sell us as much of your time as you can manage, hopefully you'll have enough left over so that you can get a semi-adequate amount of sleep and pretend to be a human being once a while or on the weekends and still be able to eat. Oh, yes, do this for years and you will earn increasing amounts of money but by that time you will be insane and old and nothing you can do with that money will be as fun because you are all creaky and probably have kids anyway who need that money to go to college and buy crack.

Can you tell that job-searching makes me angsty?

If all the knowledge in the world is contained within High Fidelity and Office Space

...does that mean I'm destined to be either a disaffected and directionless thirty-something making shit money in a record shop or a disaffected and directionless thirty-something making shit money as a cubicle monkey?

These are the things I worry about.

I like my bike

...as much as I like my hammer pants, performativity and banana vanilla yogurt. Unfortunately with my small powerless T-rex arms it has proven very difficult to remove from the car.

Guerilla composting

I walked almost a mile today with a bag of eggshells, coffee grounds and rotting lemon rinds, just so I could put our compost in an actual compost bin instead of getting fed up and throwing it into the trash like we usually do. Score one for nature! (And minus one for my dignity?)

Actually, I don't have much of anything to say

Except that Diet Dr. Pepper really does taste more like regular Dr. Pepper. And the incentivizing quality of unlimited diet soda and peanut M&Ms should not be underestimated.

Male Prostitution Seems to Be My Only Option

when you wake up with this in your head it really makes you wonder what you were dreaming about. Also I have something to say...and it is that someone needs to teach me how to embed videos because I look like an incompetent Luddite person who must hunt and gather for survival.

I never believe Molly when she says crazy things...

...But she's always right. Or at least enough to keep you guessing.

• Cable-knit sweaters are not completely unrelated to fish that eat Irishmen's faces.
• Those stupid words that you have to type that look all wrinkled are actually wrinkled parts of books.
• Putting milk in cookie dough is not a bad idea. If you want to make the cookie dough into pancakes.